Unplugged: A House With No Connection

I wrote this in an email to a friend at the beginning of the month:

"This past month has been quite the month as I decided to move out of my house by April 1st as that was the same time frame my roommate was moving out. Through a series of events I ended up not having to leave as my Landlords cut me a deal 9 days before moving day. So now I live in a huge house all my myself where I have 70% of my stuff all packed and sitting in the living room. My life cracks me up. I am also living a life without internet in the house. This has been a very interesting challenge and experiment. More refections on that as the month rolls by...."

Now, it is the last day of the month, and I have discovered that having no internet connection at home has begun this surprising journey of focus and freedom. At first I found the ties of not having the immediate answer at my finger tips to be frustrating and stressful. So many questions would pop into my head or points of curiosity that I wanted to find out more information about. Sure I could phone a friend to find out the answer, but at the same time I want people to remain my friends. As this first week rolled on I learned to realize that the only other option, besides getting into my car and heading to McDonalds because no other place with free wifi was open, was to let go. The information I needed or the desire to know something was just going to have to wait. There was truly nothing I could do about it. 

So by the end of the first week I did the only thing I could think of to bring peace of mind. Thus began the "When I have Internet Access" list. To my surprise this was the open door to the feeling of freedom. It was almost too simple: write it down and move on. No need to wrestle with my lack of information or beat myself up for not thinking of it sooner. I could make note of what was on my mind to do or the spontaneous question that floated to the forefront of my mind and then accept that things would happen when they would happen and the answers would be discovered when I needed to know them. 

This leads me now to my current phase: Extreme Focus. Now when I sit down in front of my connected computer I enter a whole different state of consciousness. My only barriers are technology and time. At the library, the time factor is very literal. The timer shows the passing moments on the bottom right-hand corner of the screen: 59:58...59:57.... If I am not using one of the library computers my time often can be even less as I stroll in after a long day at the greenhouse and only have 30 minutes until the library closes. Facebook's escalating distracting qualities are just not an option. So many other things have jumped to the top of the priority list: writing and responding to emails and researching jobs. Then, with whatever time I have left, I attended to my laundry list of items on my "When I have Internet Access" list that were noted in the meantime or hadn't been attended to yet. 

I am often floored by productivity. If the computer moved as fast as my brain, I truly could conquer the world. 

In normal reality moments, I find myself smiling as I recall and once again put to practice the way the world used to function. I have rekindled my appreciation for the local phone book for it is a true well of information. If I need to know where an area code is from when I receive an unfamiliar hone number, I consult the nationwide area code map in the front of the phone book. When I am baking, I can consult the conversion chart. 

My time connecting to the internet has taken on its own flow and rhythm. You better believe I know all of the local places that have free wi-fi and naturally have another list showing all of their business hours. Who wouldn't? The greatest setback to not having internet at home is skyping. Having a sister and brother-in-law and 2 fabulous nieces and a wonderful nephew Skype is my go-to for connection with them and to look through a special window into their world. Now Skype dates have to be made in advance and I have to be that girl: the one sitting in a hospital lobby talking to her computer. Fortunately, the Lebanon hospital lobby isn't hopping. Still, every now and again I will get some interesting looks. But this is the life I have chosen to lead for this moment at this time in this stage. I have a feeling that as the job search process becomes more and more serious other lessons and moments of create problem solving will arise. Until that time, I will continue to ride this wave of freedom and focus and let myself lean into a deeper trust. 

Broken Pots Have a Place

Like any retail establishment, some shipments arrive with a few damaged items. Flower pots fall deep into that category and all those broken and damaged items have been piling up over the years. This year, the creative genius that oozes out of one of my co-workers decided to use some of those pieces in her annual fairy garden. I just love, love the detail she put into this project: the bridge, the volleyball court, the basketball hoop, fences, and other great nooks. I am once again very glad that I got to see it and appreciate it from the beginning, for as I went and looked at it again today things look a lot different! We will see what the next few weeks will bring!!

Oh and a fun fact - I was able to contribute some broken ceramic to this collection. As I was helping Aletheia back the truck, I set a lamp down on a table sitting outside. A gust of wind came and knocked the lamp of and shattered the beautiful metallic golden base. Those pieces now give great texture and shine to the space around the volleyball court. Redemption to my carelessness.

    April 2nd

    April 6th

    Today

Winter's Loosening Grip

  

I sometimes feel like I have a sneak preview on Spring. A greenhouse is all about making a plant think it is safe for it to grow and thrive with warmer temperatures and consistent care. The world outside still waits for its moment. On my stroll through Stover's Dam today, the brave ones started to poke their heads through - breaking through winter's loosening grip, reminding me that the amazing moments of Spring always begin at just the right time.